Hmmm… It’s difficult to decide where to begin with this one but let me go into my own experiences. When I was in my teen years, it seemed as though the unspoken rule for boys was when you take a girl out and spend money on her, you should make sure you have condoms because you’re going to get some sex. Also, buying her candy, roses, stuffed animals and the like guarantees a good romp in the bedroom as well. Some of us were taught to get angry if the girl refused and bully her into either oral sex or manual release. Using intimidation to get sexual satisfaction from girls was normal and often encouraged. It’s sad to see that this mindset still exist today. Let me quickly give you a new outlook on this subject .
What we as men should keep in mind is that a woman’s body is exactly that…HER body! I know that you went out of your way to prepare for this special night with movie tickets or even concert tickets. You cleaned all the old crusty McDonald’s wrappers out of your car, trimmed your nose hairs, you manscaped your private area into the shape of the Superman emblem and clipped those eagle talons that you call toenails. You even took a Q-Tip and cleaned the disgusting wax build up out of your ears in case she decides to nibble on them while you’re pounding her to ecstasy. And then… she drops the bombshell with a big hardy “No!” after she’s been teasing you all night. In fact, she’s been teasing you for weeks now by sending sexy pics, sexting, ect. The two of you have been hot and heavy making out all night and you knew for sure you were going to fall in some. You’ve got her top off, bra undone, her pants are somewhere across the room and she’s all the way down to her Betty Boop thong. She keeps saying “No” and you keep persisting. Finally, she pushes you off and starts to get dressed. You’re pissed. Your testicles and penis are about to go into a round of “How Blue Can You Get?” that would outdo B.B. King. Now, with the conventional thinking (the thinking I grew up on), this is the moment you start tripping by getting up and yelling at her, telling her how f***ing lame she is, how pretty she really isn’t, how you’ve treated her like a princess, how stupid she is for not giving in after all this time and whatever other verbal insults you can throw at her. Once you see that she’s still resisting, you step it up a notch by acting furious and exhibiting potentially physically abusive behavior which includes yelling at the top of your voice, getting up in her face and maybe even backing her up a few feet against the wall. This is to give her the impression that she doesn’t have a choice but to give you something and you may even tell her that you’re not leaving until she does “something” for you.
Here’s another example: Those same circumstances except you’re not the aggressive type. You’re more passive aggressive. So you make sure you get her back to your place (or hers) and that you have enough alcohol to get her good and drunk. She says “No” and you keep pouring drinks until it’s a “yes” or until she passes out and then, you handle business. Even worse than that, is the coward who uses date rape drugs to ensure that by the time the night is over he gets laid.
EVERYTHING I just mentioned above is RAPE. Make no mistake about it. Both men and women have been programmed to except this as normal behavior. Women have willingly accepted the role of the victim in what are clearly sexual crimes. Men have been taught to be sexual predators without even realizing what they’re doing.
Let me offer you a fresh “2015” perspective. No matter what you’ve done for a woman; whether you’ve taken her to a fast food joint, a five star restaurant, on a cruise or on a trip to the moon and back, she doesn’t owe you her vagina any more than she owes you her kidney! Her vagina is a part of HER body to give to whomever SHE chooses, whenever SHE chooses. Listen! Even if she sent you dirty pics accompanied with dirty conversation and a promise to give it to you in a contract signed in her own blood, she still has every right to change her mind at any given time and you have no right to take sex from her or strong-arm her into any sexual activity whatsoever! Think about it. What if women thought the same way? Would you be okay with a woman giving you gifts, taking you out to dinner and then feeling entitled to get you drunk or drugged up and give you a good pounding with a strap-on? How violated would that make you feel?
Here’s a couple of suggestions. Forget the notion that doing nice things for a girl is “tricking off” or being a fool. It’s nice to do nice things for people. Consider it a treat for yourself with the added bonus of lovely female company. That way there’s no feeling of being played, owed or entitled to something. Secondly, if she says “no” consider that things may have changed for her over the course of the night. Most women are emotional beings and though she may be feeling sexual at the beginning of the night, she can lose it by the end for a variety of reasons: maybe something during the night brought up a bad memory, maybe she thinks you’re a great catch and doesn’t want to screw things up or maybe the Mexican food she devoured earlier is knocking at her back door. Who knows? Respect her wishes and don’t violate her. Another simple solution is leave her alone and move on to the next one. If you feel that she’s just playing/using you, remember that there are literally billions of vaginas out there and you can have your fair share and someone else’s fair share without resorting to intimidation or dirty tricks. In fact, statistics state that the average man has a 1 in 25 chance of having sex with a woman everyday. That means that if you were to randomly ask multiple women each day for sex, it would average out to you having sex at least once for every 25 women you asked. Those are damn good odds, boy! Go get it!
In closing, if for some idiotic reason you feel like a woman owes you for what you’ve done for her, take her to small claims court but leave her body alone!